If I have learned one thing from Hit Parade, wherein I listen to the top songs on the Billboard Hot 100, it's that most of these songs are pretty bad. If I've learned two things, the second thing is that there isn't a ton of change atop the charts. In the entire year of 2013, which is more than halfway over, a total of six songs have been number one, and two of those songs were by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. Robin Thicke's "Blurred Lines" has been the top song for a while, because people hate themselves and don't feel they deserve happiness, I safely assume.
So, you know, that leaves me without a ton to write about. However, I was then struck with an idea. Why can't I dive into the backlog of Billboard's number one songs? There is no reason I can't, and so I will. Welcome to Hit Parade Classic. Songs from all throughout the history of the Billboard Hot 100 are up for coverage, but I decided to set a few rules for myself. First, and most importantly, they can't be songs I have ever heard before. That doesn't really keep with why I began this endeavor initially. Second, I decided I wanted to go for songs that I wasn't even all that familiar with, by musicians I have, at best, a tangentially knowledge of. There are a ton of Katy Perry songs I haven't heard, which is to say all of them, but I don't really feel like discussing songs and artists that are so notable and pored over. I'm sure there is something interesting to be said there, but I'd rather dive into Billboard Hot 100 ephemera and esoterica.
As such, I decided to head backwards from the present until I found a song and an artist I had, at best, a passing knowledge of. That song? "Like a G6" by Far East Movement featuring The Cataracs and Dev. It reached number one on October 30, 2010, just in time for Halloween, and stayed atop the charts for three weeks. I can only assume the title is some sort of reference to Battleship. The game, not the moving featuring Rihanna. That would have had to have been a portent, and I don't want to engage in stereotypes of the Far East and their peoples. I don't take life advice from any Donna Chang that picks up the phone.
Well, after listening to this song, I assume that G6 isn't a reference to Battleship or even Candyland. Don't Wake Daddy is still a possibility. The lady in the hook sings about feeling so fly like a G6. Based on my limited knowledge of aircraft, and the fact they sometimes have letters and numbers attached to them, I imagine that's the reference point. However, "Like a G6" has nothing to do with flying aside from that one line in the chorus. And even that is about being fly, presumably beyond the standards set for a white guy. This is just your typical rap song about being awesome and stuff. Similes!
I mostly just want to talk about the hook, honestly. The rest of the song does nothing for me. The lyrics are hard to decipher, the rapping isn't all that impressive, and what I gather doesn't interest me. There is some line about being sober or something and stuff about ladies, but it isn't anything special. The hook, though, which I can only assume is supplied by Dev, who is, alas, not Dev Patel from The Last Airbender movie, I really like. First, the beat is catchy and bouncy and pleasant enough. It has a techno vibe and a sort of dance beat, but it is also low key, which is necessarily with the vocals. Dev's singing style is laid back and low key in their own right. They remind me of the erstwhile Kitty Pryde, but without the stange flow. It sounds a lot more like your typical singing, but without energy.
This isn't an issue, however. I like the way she sounds. Her voice has an interesting tinge to it I can't quite articulate. I wish this was her song entirely, because she's much more enjoyable to listen to. The lyrics are also completely clear in the hook, which is nice. Of course, that doesn't mean they are quality. They are interesting, though. First, Dev uses the word "slizzered" which I can only abide because I like the way it sounds when she says it. Later, she talks about sipping sizzurp "like Three 6." This is, of course, a reference to Three 6 Mafia and their ode to sippin' on some sizzurp. Man, the couplet about Three 6 and being fly like a G6 is a strained one. They are certainly unique lyrics, dare I say odd, but not necessarily good. It is partially endearing due to originality, and Dev's vocals, and that combined with the beat makes for an overall enjoyable chorus that gets dropped a few times.
I don't know if "Like a G6" by Far East Movement was a great choice to start Hit Parade Classic. I don't have strong feelings about it positively or negatively. It's a mediocre song with a good chorus and a bunch of other stuff that just sort of exists. The song content isn't anything interesting or new. Whatevs, is basically what I am saying. Also, I still don't know if Far East Movement is from the Far East. I didn't watch the video, just listened to the song. I would assume they are, to some degree, genetically Asian, but it is possible they aren't. After all, The Dwarves are all pretty much average height, and Parliament-Funkadelic had no political jurisdiction anywhere. Pixies, however, are all a bunch of impish, magical creatures. I don't know anything about The Cataracs either. I feel this may be for the best. Here's to a brighter tomorrow for us all.